Why do I have such a hard time realizing how big the difference is between fantasy and reality? Why didn't I learn my lesson the first time with Susan when I convinced her that I wanted her to give me punishment spankings? Am I just really dumb, or is this something that most people do? These are questions that are going through my head after last weekend.
As you know, our new chastity device arrived last week. Chastity enforced by my wife is something that I have fantasized for a long time. It has taken me years to even discuss it with her, let alone have her agree to try it. So, I was extremely excited about the fact that I would finally begin to experience it this past weekend. I was so arroused on Friday night that she had extreme difficulty putting the device on me. I had to force myself to relax so my erection would subside enough for it to be clamped around my balls.
Once it was there, reality came into play. Susan has become a master at sexually teasing me, which I love. However, ususally, when she teases me, I eventually get to orgasm. Friday night was different. I pleased her, she teased me. Her teasing resulted in extreme discomfort as my cock tried to expand in its new home. That discomfort caused the arrousal to subside. But, then I was teased some more. And, Friday night, the device didn't come off. I had to go to sleep unfulfilled and very uncomfortable. I didn't sleep much or well. This was not the fantasy I envisioned, but it was the reality of what I asked for.
Saturday was also a very hard day. The device is uncomfortable. It is hard to pee. The literature says you can pee standing or sitting. Well, I tried to pee standing two times. Both resulted in a mess. So, I was reduced to sitting to pee. Again, this was not my fantasy.
Saturday arrived and Susan decided to spank me in an erotic way, which always results in a raging hard on for me. However (and I know you can guess what is coming next), I was restricted, so the pleasure of her spanking only created more discomfort and frustration. The good news is that after the spanking (and a bit more teasing), Susan decided to release me from my device. We then made love that resulted in us each acting like a couple of teenagers. It was fantastic to finally be able to experience a full erection again, especially within her. This was part of my fantasy!
In the end, it was an amazing weekend. Given how much Susan enjoyed it, I know I will be locked up much in the future. However, much of the reality was not part of my fantasy.
Would I go down this pathway again, realizing again how different fantasy is from reality? Saturday afternoon, the answer would have been "no". Today my answer is "maybe" (because Saturday night was so wonderful). Tomorrow or next week, I'd be willing to bet that the resounding answer will be "yes", because fantasy always seems to take over.
Have others had the same experience with fantasy vs. reality? If so, do you keep repeating the ability to ignore reality and act solely on fantasy?