Sunday, March 13, 2016

Domestic Discipline or Rape?

I have been hoping the Barry would feel comfortable to personally share information about what happened last weekend with Carol.  However, I don't think that is going to happen.  It is still a bit raw for him and he's not ready or able to share much about it.

He and I have had a number of discussions the past week about one aspect of how Carol disciplined him.  Our discussions were focused on Barry's reaction to Carol massaging and milking his prostate gland.  I probably shouldn't have been, but I was surprised when Barry told me that he felt violated by her actions.  At first, I didn't fully understand his reaction.. However, as we talked I became more understanding of his perception that she was personally stimulating a sexual area (the male P-spot) for the purpose of making him climax (albeit a very non-rewarding climax).  He viewed that very differently than just inserting a butt plug or dildo in his bottom.  He really made me stop and think when he asked me how I would feel if his brother inserted his fingers in my vagina and also used them to stimulate my clitoris to the point of climax.  My honest answer was that I would feel like I was being raped.  And, that is exactly how Barry felt.

I am saddened that I didn't realize that would be his reaction.  I am also sorry that I gave Carol such carte blanche authority to discipline Barry.  That was a mistake that I will not make again.  On the positive side, I am glad to learn that there is a limit to Barry submissive side.  I didn't know where that limit was (or if it existed), but now I do.  That is a good thing.

We continue to grow ...



  1. I think Barry should be grateful for everything you provide to please him. If this didn't work out, well now you know. I really thought he might have enjoyed it, I don't think that he should feel violated, from the way it sounds he likes to be humiliated. Just consider it a learning experience.
    On another note, You have said Barry feels he is under-endowed...what is the length when he is erect? I would sat 5 1/2 - 6 inches is average.

  2. I can understand Barry feeling that way. When he was loaned out was he aware she could do as she pleased? I'm trying to put myself in his position and how I'd feel. Being submissive if I was loaned out the person would know I'm submissive and was to be submissive to them. So if she wanted to spank me I'd obey like I do to mistress. if she wanted to plug or rub my prostate like mistress has done I'd accept it as showing my submission to a person that has permission.
    I hope Barry feels better about it maybe the three of you could talk.

  3. I'm still trying to wrap this around my head. Barry was ok with his sister-in-law using his mouth with a strapon, but two fingers in his bottom was over the top? Seems like a piece of the puzzle is missing here. Comparing it with the roles reversed doesn't make sense either, you aren't the submissive, he is. Good luck.

  4. WOW!! Unfortunate!! I think that you, Barry, and your sister need to sit down, talk, and resolve this matter!!

    Misunderstandings need to be corrected and apologies need to be sincerely stated!!

    I am sorry that Barry got "harmed"!!

  5. Thank you Susan for sharing both your thoughts and Barry's. I have been waiting to learn about how he felt about the experience since he has often shared a post about his side of an experience. I'm sorry he felt hurt by the experience. After several of your other "embarrassment" adventures it is hard for me to see it as he has.

    The scene as you first described it was so very erotic, I was blown away. Likely only a fantasy for me, so I loved reading your telling of it. I can't speak for other submissives, but if my wife had turned me over to her sister I would have loved it! Curiously,the part about the enema was more difficult for me to imagine my sister-in-law performing on me.

    As the submissive in the relationship I trust and accept my wife's decisions, and that they are done in love.

    Wishing you the best as you work through this. Penney

  6. I understand. Something similar happened to me once and left me feeling the same way as Barry. It is, as you say, a lesson learned - but also it is not one either of you could predict, so I hope you will make sure you forgive yourself.

  7. Really? He should be on his knees thanking you for everything you do for him.

  8. Are you kidding me? Tell him to man up, he doesn't know how lucky he is!!!! You and Carol are amazing!!!! Barry needs more punishment for all the nonsense he's done to you. I'll gladly take his place. I hope he gets a punishment spanking from you and Carol for being so ungrateful

  9. Hi Susan
    I have to agree with the sentiments expressed by the last two commenters. Barry was being punished and part of it was the forced orgasm not really sexual at all in the context of the discipline being administered. Quite honestly I thought Carol administered an impressively creative and effective punishment and Barry's whining about it would have in this house earned me a second one from my wife for showing defiance because that's what this is on his part. I have read most of your blog now and it seems to me Barry is often more interested in sexual gratification than real discipline. He plays at discipline and manipulates you and others to get what he wants.He certainly was not raped by Carol but he was well punished and that's what he is complaining about. He needs firmly taken in hand and the sooner you do this the better for both of you.

  10. Thank You for the last two posts. i have to admit, reading about the day was pretty darn exciting, i thought.
    i take away it's good to have a better idea on "limits" for the future, but it does seem that one act being different from everything else in a sub arrangement certainly would be hard to predict! i would not consider Carol's actions to be over the line to merit that word, in any case.

  11. I mean Barry is getting everything he wants here. He likes what is being done to him. He says he's submissive but when it comes to discipline he doesn't seem to accept it. He had no problem grabbing Carols ass, but when it came time for that punishment he didn't like it. It seems Barry is the one who likes to be in control. Like I sad before, he needs to man up and realize how lucky he is. In my opinion he's won the lottery and he doesn't appreciate it at all.

  12. Susan,
    Like most of your readers I admire you and the efforts you make to support Barry's needs. But both of you need to decide what your spanking relationship is about. If it is really about fulfilling his erotic fantasies, then keep on doing what you are doing. But if its discipline to improve his behavior and punishment when he slips up, its time to make that clear to him. I know you have spanked him hard and some of your techniques with the vibrator would intimidate most men spanking him after orgasm. But Barry seems to treat it as an erotic game and I believe after reading your blog for several years that he needs firm consistent discipline and needs to know that's what it is. Someone said above that Barry's complaining about Carol's methods would have earned him a second spanking. I don't even want to think about what my wife would have done but its clear Barry thinks its all fun and games.Get his masturbation habit under control probably using a cock cage until he can be trusted and spank him hard every time he disobeys you and do that for at least three months. You will see amazing results

  13. Also I hope Carol wasn't upset by Barry's reaction, the last thing she needs is to feel guilty over his nonsense. I'm on team Carol and Susan on this one. Barry needs some serious discipline from you both. He can't call the shots anymore. Susan is in complete control at all times!!!! Once again, Man UP Barry!!!!!! You are the luckiest man on earth and you don't even know it!!!

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