Thursday, September 30, 2010


This is my first attempt at creating and maintaining a blog, so I hope you will bear with me as I learn and grow.  I hope to be able to share how my husband and I came to enjoy spanking, as well as other creative and kinky methods of discipline in our marriage.

We are a middle aged couple living in the northeast United States.  I don't want to share more details than that and I won't post any real pictures of ourselves or our residence because we could easily be identified in our small community.  However, I will attempt to share as many details of our thoughts and activities and how spanking plays a major role in our marriage.  I expect to be the primary contributor to the blog, but I will also have Barry add his thoughts and reactions whenever possible.  I also hope that readers will interact with us so that we can learn from them.

My introduction to spanking occurred approximately six months ago and when I discovered Barry exploring female dominant spanking websites.  It was a very shocking experience for me and it was very embarrassing for Barry.  I had a hard time understanding how he could be interested in the type of activities I saw on the screen.  He was also humiliated that I found out about his secret interest. 

We spent a lot of time talking about his "interests", and it was not easy or comfortable.  I learned a lot of things that I really didn't want to hear about, some of which were truly shocking.  It was very difficult to hear that he had been seeing professional dominatrixes and spankers who would spank him while he was traveling for work.  However, our conversations made me realize that there was a reason why our sex life had been waning during the previous months.  It became apparent that he was getting more sexual satisfaction and gratification from the websites he visited and from professional spankers than he was from making love with me.  That was a very hard pill to swallow.

Once I got over all of the shock and frustration, I decided that I needed to make some changes in my life in order to keep  our sex life meaningful and active.  So, Barry and I had many more long talks and I spent lots of time at the computer with him learning what types of things excited him (We still do that, but I will share more about that in later posts).  It was not easy at first, but we each learned to get over our embarrassment and share with each other.

I also had to learn how to spank Barry, which was not easy.  Causing pain to someone was completely foreign to me and it became clear that Barry wanted/needed to be spanked hard enough to cause some significant pain.  I also learned that he had a desire to spank me!  That was even more difficult for me to understand.  However, after three years, we have worked through many issues and have created a new, highly creative sex life that involves spanking and other kinky activities.  And, our sex life is now the best it has ever been.

So ... after reading many blogs and visiting many websites with Barry, I have come to the realization that I should share our journey with others.  I now know that we are not unique in this world.  I will do my best to share the process we have gone through; and hopefully readers will share with us, so we can all continue to learn and grow.

I will also ask readers to bear with me as I learn this new blogging technology.  I will also appreciate any and all feedback concerning this blog and how I can make it better.


  1. As a male in a relationship with a wife I love I can sincerely appreciate what you have done for Barry. (Here's wishing my wife would do the same)
    I hope you will continue to post and maybe I can later use your words and blog to help convince my very vanilla wife to participate in some out of the ordinary activities.

  2. Beautiful story, keep on working together.


  3. Susan and Barry: It is wonderful for me that I have stumbled across your blog. I see that either Barry or yourself occasionally look at my blog, and I will post a link to your blog in a few days. (I want to read more so that I can better describe this gold mine of material) Your efforts on behalf of Barry and your married happiness sounds to be very similar to the efforts Cindy has made for our marital happiness.

  4. I think Barry is very lucky. I too have seen pros, and have spent a lot of time on line. Spanking is kinky but so what. I yearn to be really controlled bare bottom Otk of a lover. I was spanked by a friend's mother as a boy. I deserved the spanking. As she yanked my pants down a spanked me furiously I screamed and kicked and begged her to stop. It was a really serious spanking and I couldn't sit comfortably for a few days. While she held me so tightly and spanked so hard I hated it. But I have been trying ever since to feel that feeling again.